When I lead, many times I feel like I need to uphold an image.
I feel I need to be more cunning, more resourceful, and more knowledgeable in order to combat many different problems and obstacles that arise as a leader.
The image I have created for a leader is based on pieces of lofty ideals different figures I look up to uphold.
I find myself wanting to convey passion in faith to the level of John Piper. 🙏
Or imitate the concise speaking style of Simon Sinek. 🎤
Or speak in logical paths like Jordan Peterson. 🏫
Or hold the attention of an audience like Steve Jobs. 🍎
Or be compelling for others to follow my crazy visions like Elon Musk. 🚀
Pastors, inspirational leaders, famous entrepreneurs; all these people influenced me through their words, achievements, and lives.
Recently though, I’ve been trying to let go of that image of perfection and try to be real rather than try to be always right.
I recognize that perfection is impossible to achieve. 🚫
Though it is fun playing around with the idea of becoming like these leaders, the problem with chasing after so many different ideals was that I easily lose myself and forget who I am.
Though I aspired to one day become like “Steve Jobs” or “Elon Musk”, I ended up becoming someone I was not. 🤔
I lost the aspect of wanting to be real and express myself, and try to conform myself to the image of people I aspire to become. Though there’s nothing wrong with trying to aim towards learning the public speaking patterns of Simon Sinek, or take note of the passion and conviction John Piper had, when imitation becomes an unhealthy obsession, I found myself leading a different life.
I found myself humbled and needing to face truth. Learning to accept who God had specifically made me, and let go of my dream of trying to be who I’m not.
As I processed my image and learned to let go what I built up, I started to focus on the things I could improve. The small steps I could take to be like the many people I valued without the unrealistic expectations.
Things like integrity. The truth I spoke. Discipline. How I utilized my time & money. How I used my words to bless and empower others.
Values & characteristics that would take a lifetime to work on, but would be more conducive to living. The moment I distinguished what I could and couldn’t do, I found peace. Not that I had it all figured out, but I had clarity and direction of what I needed to focus and grow.
To rebuild a real transparent image of who I am.